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Guillermo  has been a valuable addition to our practice. As a student , he is moving on to another internship and we want to wish him well.

Good Luck Guillermo, and thank you for your help. We wish you all the success in the world.

Inside Out, Outside In

February 4th, 2014 | Posted by Memo in Uncategorized - (0 Comments)

When we come across a person that is smiling, it makes us feel comfortable and it gives us a reason to trust the person.  Granted, just because a person smiles, that does not mean we should trust the person completely, it is only a single factor among many.  Smiling shows confidence and a sense of happiness, it shows that we are at ease with ourselves and others in our lives.  So, what goes on inside of us, affects what goes on outside.

Many times, we don’t want to be perceived as fake.  Many of us think that if we don’t feel confident or happy, then we don’t have a right to smile.  Research has shown, however, that one can work on the outside to make changes on the inside creating a more positive cycle.  That means that if we are upset or hopeless and we show an expression of being upset and hopeless, we will continue to feel upset and hopeless.  If we smile more often, this will help us feel happier and at ease which will translate into a more natural smile showing happiness which will translate into feeling happier.

New Year Resolutions: Good or Bad?

December 31st, 2013 | Posted by Memo in Uncategorized - (0 Comments)

If you set goals and go after them with all the determination you can muster, your gifts will take you places that will amaze you. - Les Brown

 

Year after year, many a resolution is made. To weight, to leave the cigarrettes in the past, to make my family a priority, to get along better with others, to let go of the resentments, etc. Yet only 8% of Americans keep their resolutions. This brings up the question then, is it worth making a resolution when we know we have a 92% chance of not making them a reality?

One issue with the resolutions that we set for ourselves is that the bar might be set too high. In order to keep them, we have to make sure that the end result is fulfilled at 100%, meaning that if my resolution was to lose 20 pounds, I will not be happy by losing even 19 pounds. Many of us may see this as a failure and give up our healthy lifestyle in disgrace.
A solution to this might be smaller goals instead of a large one. For example, one could set a resolution of losing 5 pounds, which is easier than 20, and when that goal is achieved, setting a goal of 5 more pounds. It is human nature that success brings us some happiness and it also makes us more determined. If one loses 5 pounds, then one could be excited about those other 5 pounds to come!
Another problem is that we usually go at it without some kind of support system. By doing so, we internalize everything and make decisions with only one point of view. When working for our goals, it is advisable to involve others as well. This includes family, friends and professionals, including counselors. By involving others, we feel the need to stay commited. Not only that, but as the saying goes, “two heads think better than one!” By having a counselor guide us, we are able to find more solutions to our problems and easier ways to get to our goals.
So, resolutions can be helpful, but it all depends on how you work with them and how you work for them. May 2014 bring you success, happiness and fulfillments.

Enjoy the journey!

- Guillermo

Thanking the New Beginnings

November 26th, 2013 | Posted by Memo in Uncategorized - (0 Comments)

Show no fear
For she may fade away…
In your hand
The birth of a new day…

- Giorgio Moroder and Keith Forsey “The Never Ending Story”

 

Have you ever felt that when things go bad you have a bad day and things get worse so your day gets worse?  It’s like a never ending cycle that keeps going forever and ever.  It seems impossible to stop thinking about how things are going wrong for us, doesn’t it?

“I woke up late, so I didn’t get a chance to eat breakfast.  I was rushing through traffic, but some people decide to go slow on the left lane of the highway.  I’m still hungry.  Finally made it to work to find that I have a new pile of projects waiting on my desk while I haven’t finished yesterday’s work!  My boss is mean to me, my wife is mean to me, even my dog seems to be indifferent now.  It’s freezing and I have an allergy.  It’s not even 9 o’clock yet and yes, I’m still hungry…..”

This is everyday life for some.  It even irritates us that Joe from the accounting department is mostly in a good mood.  How could he have no problems at all?  Who wouldn’t like to trade places with someone else for a day?

Well, maybe if we got to see what Joe is going through we could point out many troubles throughout his life.  Ailing mother, debts, a side business that didn’t make it, rusty pipes at home that would cost thousands of dollars to fix, etc.  How would we react?  Would we be able to be in a good mood?  Perhaps it’s not his life or even ours that makes a difference, perhaps is just us.  Could I have a bad moment during the day?  Definitely!  Should it make or break my day?  Well, that’s a different story and entirely up to you.

Changing a habit is not easy, any habit.  Having a bad day everyday or almost everyday is a habit worth changing.  Breaking the cycle of a mentality that could even affect our physical health.  Our job as mental health providers is to help the client out from a third person perspective, but everyone can begin the process at any point before even setting foot in our office.

One way to do it is to be thankful.  I have found that a list of gratitude sets the pace of change.  Maybe Joe is thankful for having many years of enjoying his now sick mother.  Maybe the business he had left him with accounting experience he’s able to use in his work.  He also seems to have a home where pipes need to be fixed, but it’s still a home.

Here’s today’s challenge.  Can you find things that you are grateful for?  If it does feel hard to, would you at least be able to be thankful for just waking up?  It’s a small step, and huge or tiny, a step is a step towards change.

Thanksgiving is here and it’s time to start to get rid of old unhealthy habits and creating new ones.  Learning to set our day instead of the situations doing so.  It’s never too late!

Thank you for reading this,

- Guillermo

Marriage Seminar

October 4th, 2013 | Posted by Anastacia Martinez in Uncategorized - (0 Comments)

This past weekend I had the pleasure of attending a training in Dallas. It was sponsored by National Marriage Seminars and it was called Gottamn Method Couples Therapy Level 1: Bridging the Couple Chasm.

Memorial Day

May 20th, 2013 | Posted by Anastacia Martinez in Uncategorized - (0 Comments)

As Memorial Day approaches- I would like to take a moment to thank our Military for their service. As a provider- I am in contact with a lot of Military personnel- in my office

and in my previous service as a counseling consultant on a variety of Military Posts around the world- I do appreciate what you do on a daily basis.

This day, also serves in Remembrance, of all those who have passed through this life, leaving their mark on this earth and in our lives.

May you rest in peace.

 

 

Spring break is coming up, so it is time to create some new happy  memories with our love ones. Let’s not forget about ourselves. When it comes to looking after others-

whether it is our children, spouse and friends- we can give what we possess. However, it is also true, that we can develop what we do not have by giving to others.

The point being, that we always at the core – of our own lives.

Enjoy

Blogging

November 6th, 2012 | Posted by Anastacia Martinez in Uncategorized - (0 Comments)

I appreciate the responses to my blog from a handful of followers. I will try to continue working to respond to your interest. There seems to be a keen interest wen it comes to couples’s communication, infidelity and the effects of the internet.

Parenting

October 23rd, 2012 | Posted by Anastacia Martinez in Uncategorized - (5 Comments)

Say what you mean, and mean what you say.
When it comes to parenting, there is a basic rule: Speak less and Act more.
Giving your child too many explanations will make him/her believe you are on an equal level wih him/her,
So- why listen to you?
The arguments can go on forever, while the dishes are still not done, and picking up their room seems more of an ideology rather than something that can be implemented in actual practice.
The competition on who can come up with the best reasons to do , or not do, depending on which side of the fence you are on, can be endless.
One reason should be sufficient- if it is really necessary. For instance “You cannot eat cookies right now because we are getting ready to have dinner”- Good enough explanation- respectfull and concise.
On the other hand, no reasons really needed to ask a child to stop hitting his brother- a stop, either or choice should be given in place of an explanation.
Remember-be brief, and clear. Avoid being repetitious.

We moved!

October 19th, 2012 | Posted by Anastacia Martinez in Uncategorized - (0 Comments)

We are finally at our new location at 3127 Montana. We are also very lucky to welcome Monica H. Torres, LPC to our practice. Welcome Monica!